hide and thrillseek
i need to bury the things i love so i can look for them later. right now i’m having too much fun on my own.
(Source: dvdp, via wekissedthestars)
i need to bury the things i love so i can look for them later. right now i’m having too much fun on my own.
as i follow the sides of you, hands tracing shapes i realize, i might be losing sight. in darkness i cleave to you, having no more use for eyes, and lesser fear of the sleeping danger i can no longer see. i smooth the faults, feeling only fingertips on skin - a connection, and not a surface - flesh on flesh becoming nowhere differentiable. do we have dimensions, and can we go deep? it might just be good programming (the timing wasn’t right, but the show goes on) - a pattern of mornings and miss you’s - how many iterations should there be? are we just speaking in code, and at the end will we compile? i could be stuck in a continuous loop with you, hands clasped and then around. until i find myself as a tumor, growing so fast and fond, extending my stay way beyond. i have a hope that you will never decide to operate, but if you do, you might discover that there are no clear lines to cut me away. i am inextricable, and we are self-similar - together and the same seen near or far… and even if we end up broken we remain, natural and complex, maybe even beautiful.
can’t wait for fall,
back into your arms again. time is no matter,
see us going on to forever.
i feel the 2 days of space already, 4 months might be a stretch. yet i know it doesn’t happen often, being given the happiness that is keeping me afloat. i learn to let go of the little things, and wonder why i was even holding onto them in the first place. no more frustration or crisis trying to make things fit right. lying in the dark with everything in its place - neck, limbs, waves of breath, even strands of hair. my heart bursting, my head confused from trying to parse out my elation. i finally broke the spell! no longer settling dust, thinking i don’t deserve better. i am the lightest, and i’m not even in love yet. strings cut and i’m soaring, never coming down. gonna stay high forever.
feels like it’s been forever and for the first time i can find no fault no flaw nothing fatal that could keep me away nothing in my destiny to keep me safe from you. so happy hyperventilating away telling over two decades of life stories in the span of 3 days. so crazy that i can talk to someone who likes me for me who responds appropriately intellectually endearingly entertainingly… oh dear god i can’t get it out of my head, so obsessed, so pleasantly surprised, so caught up in the miracle of it all. life finally becomes something i want to live. i believe in things again. i look forward and for once i have no fear that distance or time will have any disruption on such wonders we’ve observed.
i am so lucky what have i done to deserve it. i have been walking for so long and now i’ve finally crossed stars. truly and always tinereţe fără bătrâneţe şi viaţă fără de moarte. life is being unbelievably kind right now i fear..
